jeith | is that alright

is that alright

[It'd been on the back of his mind ever since they agreed that their next step was to return to Earth in order to replace the Castle of Lions, like a ghost silently following him around whenever there isn't something immediately life threatening to hold his attention. For so long he's insisted that there was nothing to go back home to, That by the end of it all he made everyone turn their backs on him and that this was all for the best. It's the only narrative that makes him stop looking at the past and look towards the present and future, and it had served him so well for as long as it lasted.

The return to Earth refuses to be simple though, and barely even before the dust of their destroyed planet had even settled, there'd only been one person in his mind: Griffin. Was he okay? Did he survive this? And then only few minutes later that Garrison car had shown up to pick them up from the ruins of Platt City and that achingly familiar voice had momentarily rendered Keith speechless.

That was just several hours ago, but somehow it feels like a lifetime has passed already between the endless reunions, briefings, status reports and navigating around an entire military's chain of command where it'd only been the paladins before. He doesn't know what to expect from Griffin anymore, but he knows without a doubt that he deserves every single cold look, and grimaces his way through the guy's criticism of his team, somehow knowing it's not even about Hunk, it's him. Griffin wants to yell at him and that's.......

Maybe that's egotistical. Maybe the guy's doing far less thinking about Keith than Keith is doing about him.... and maybe he hopes that's true for Griffin's sake. It's that thought that keeps him from seeking Griffin out on his own. As much as he wants to apologize, he knows not everyone gets to and that not everyone wants one.

Then again that might also just be cowardice in the guise of empathy; Keith doesn't know. But he does know that when Griffin and Veronica turn up unexpectedly at the hangar to help him and Hunk, he's inexplicably, selfishly relieved. They return to the Garrison base without Hunk's parents, but there's a greater sense of resolve in the air. Hunk's going to save his family, they're going to liberate Earth and--]

...James.

[He reaches out grabbing the other boy's arm, heart thudding in his chest.]

Can we talk?

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Uh...right now?

[That's getting a blink. Just.. how is supposed to do this, James.]

Well you're kinda in my room. It'd be weird if I left.

[ This gets another chuckle from James, despite the fact that he's the one who phrased himself badly to start with. ]

No, no, just... generally. Over time.

[ Then after a pause and with a grin: ] To be fair, I absolutely would not mind you trying to show your sincere intentions of making me happy now either.

[...Ah. That's a dangerous look on James' face and a dangerous invitation. It's also slightly jarring to hear right off the back of something that'd otherwise been cloying at his sense of guilt. Keith can't decide if the mood whiplash is annoying or preferable to continuing that previous line of conversation.

Well. At least if what James is saying is annoying again, there's an easy way to stop it that just so happens to coincide with what he's getting at.

After a moment, Keith lets go of his hand and gives James a hard shove, pushing him onto his back and climbs on top of him. Pinning the boy's shoulders against the mattress, he leans close enough to almost brush their lips together again, but not quite.]

That a challenge?

[ ...oh.

James winds up staring up at Keith mesmerized for a moment. Though this had indeed been what he was hoping for, it happened so swiftly and with such determination that he can't help but feel... something. Something that is definitely moving his blood circulation and potentially bringing some color to his face - he hates that effect, but ah well. It can't be helped. ]

... maybe so. You wouldn't back down, would you?

[ With Keith's head so close, James can't resist reaching up to run his hand through his hair again. ]

[With the protective gear gone, Keith's fingers dig into James' shoulders, feeling out his frame. James is taller now, a little more toned than he was at 17, and they both have a bit of re-familiarizing to do on a physical level.

The flush is satisfying to see, but it's not enough to chase out the idle question of just how many people got to see this particular view that used to only be his. Whether James put up a front of still being in control for them or if he simply melted pliantly into the touch....

It well and truly doesn't matter if that's all in the past and James wants him back, but the thought still leaves a faintly acrid aftertaste in Keith's mouth. He draws back, putting a pinch of distance between them.]

I dunno, James. You're blushing already. You really think you can handle it?

Edited (randomly caught a typo and had to fix it sry) 2019-02-01 17:22 (UTC)

[ ... of course Keith would call this out immediately. Naturally he wouldn't be able to mask any of his nervous excitement for even a second. Hiding things from Keith seems pretty impossible, unless the thing being hidden is your passionate love for him. What a guy. ]

I'll have you know, I've become pretty tough in the past few years. I'll handle you just fine.

[There's enough ambiguity in there what with the occupation being what it is that Keith doesn't immediately retort with yeah, you got some practice in, I get it already., but the reply doesn't leave him wanting to be gentle with James either.]

You say that. But you're still as rotten as ever.

[And with that, he closes the distance to bite at his neck.]

Edited 2019-02-01 21:23 (UTC)

[ This prompts a sharp intake of breath from James who wasn't actually prepared for biting just yet, but definitely doesn't mind. ]

Mmhmm...

[ As fun as the pillow princess act was, as much as he loved teasing Keith into action, just laying back won't cut it anymore now. His arms go up to wrap themselves around Keith's back tightly, one hand brushing over the back of his neck. ]

Guess you have pretty bad taste then...

[There's no immediate reply to that. Keith keeps his attention focused on James' neck, alternating between gently sucking at his warm skin and quick bites. Maybe part of it's just to get James to shut up, but one way or another he doesn't stop until there's a new purple bruise on the boy's neck. Only them Keith breathes out and leaves a kiss right at a pulse point.]

Nah, You're the exception.

[Then shifting upwards, he presses their foreheads together.]

But you're also mine, so what can I do.

[ This attention definitely has James sighing contentedly within moments. He knows this is going to leave a mark that is visible, but he can't bring himself to care at all. Hiding his neck efficiently is a problem for tomorrow James, whenever he recovers his sanity. Current James is loving the possessive attention, even more so when the word 'mine' is spoken out loud.

His smile this time is far from teasing. ]

Nothing but enjoy it anyway, because I'm certainly not letting go of you ever again.

[ The kiss he presses on Keith's mouth is short and fleeting, followed by two others for each side of his jaw and then finally one on the collarbone, where he murmurs against Keith's skin: ]

So maybe I should return this claiming favor...

[There's a flutter somewhere in his heart when James responds to the banter in a softer way than expected. Keith tries to ignore that missed beat without much success. it had felt good to say that James is his outright and even better to know that it's true just by looking at the other's contented smile.

But against his better judgment he smiles back, eyes fluttering shut as James leaves kisses of his own. The immediate desire to swallow at the feel of lips near his throat is also frustratingly difficult to ignore.]

Maybe you should.

[Or really, he shouldn't. Marks are going to be annoying to explain if anyone sees.... but then again, Keith doesn't actually care if people know they're together. Not really.]

You could leave one somewhere only I can see if you wanted.

[ James should be complaining that Keith left a hickey in the literally most obvious of places and yet suggests that James shouldn't do the same. Really, that would be worth complaining about. And yet the idea of secret markings simply isn't bad. Secrets only between them have a nostalgic connotation that isn't all negative.

But no matter what his emotions on the matter are... ]

Could I?

[ He pulls a little at the black fabric that covers most of Keith's body still. ]

[The skin tight under armor hadn't actually left much to the imagination and taking the thing off was more a formality than anything else, but there's still a pause. He's saying a lot of bold words before the rest of the implications catch up to his brain, and with an oddly nervous churning in his stomach, Keith nods.]

You could.

[Hesitant for just another moment, he pulls away from James to straddle him at the hips. sitting up straight, Keith tries not to think about the fact that this is the first time he's stripped down for a lover in years. That he'll get to see James without his mission gear on again and there's just something about this that makes Keith swallow hard. It had always felt so much like shedding an exterior facade for each other in those days when they were cadets pulling off each others uniforms.

Heart starting to race with anticipation, he reaches up to his neck. His fingers brush a straight line down his torso. The black fabric opens up like he'd pulled down an invisible zipper of some sort. Keith slides one arm out of the body suit, then the other with a smooth ease that something like spandex would have never allowed. The fabric comes off his shoulders and slides down to bunch around his hips.

Glancing at James' face, he pushes aside the thudding in his chest and places his hand over James' heart instead.]

This good enough?

[Taking the rest of it off's going to have to involve Keith getting off James and well.. he's fairly comfortable as he is.]

Edited 2019-02-02 08:55 (UTC)

...wow.

[ It's breathed out quietly and involuntarily, not at all for show. There simply is something about combining the feeling Keith's weight on his hips and watching Keith take off his clothes for him... Something that does get his blood flowing, for lack of better expression. Keith can probably feel his heartbeat thumping very clearly.

Then, louder, James answers: ] Perfect.

[ He pushes himself off the mattress to wrap his arms around Keith's naked torso as the other sits on his lap. The warm skin feels pleasant under his fingers.

James buries his face in Keith's shoulder for a moment, simply smiling to himself at the proximity, before leaving a trail of kisses down his neck and to his collarbone, which gets nibbled on gently for a moment. Easy to hide, but not... entirely effortless to. That's a good compromise. ]

[Keith was annoyed with James less than a minute ago. Really, he was. True, there wasn't any gravity behind it, but still. Something in the back of his mind protests feebly, reminding him that this was the case, but it doesn't come anywhere close to putting a dent in the way that the word perfect has him skipping yet another beat, and the way James' mouth moves against his neck and collarbone sends a distinct shiver straight down his spine. Instinctively, Keith wraps his own arms around him tightly, pressing his lips to the other boy's shoulder.]

...ah...

[The soft sigh escapes his mouth before Keith can think better of it. Heart beating faster, it's hard not to be pulled into just how good that feels. Because it's James and even though there are new, different doubts between them, he knows he's wanted, and that....

That has Keith breath hitch at the feel of teeth. His hands shift down to tug upwards at James' shirt.]

This is coming off now.

.... is it?

[ James murmurs lazily against Keith's collarbone, not quite willing to stop his assault just yet. The sigh Keith had given was simply too delicious... but then again, the idea of moving forward is not all that bad either. James sucks down on the reddened skin one more time and then separates himself to allow his shirt to be pulled up over his head and then idly discarded on the floor next to the bed.

And that leaves them half-naked in front of each other for the first time in half a decade. James doesn't think his body actually leaves anything to be desired, so he can't say he's insecure, but the nostalgic feeling is... somewhere between awkward and exciting. James has wanted to do this for so long and at the same time denied himself even the mere acknowledgement that he missed it.

Now that he actually can bring their bodies together, skin on skin, his heart is beating out of his chest just like it did the first time they clumsily took off each other's clothes. Maybe more so. Back then... he hadn't been thinking, there had been something feverish about it all. And while it would be a vast overestimation to say that James is in full control of his sanity and emotions right now, he's still far more capable of reflecting on what is happening while it is happening.

He lets his hands wander over Keith's torso, unashamed and appreciating, until his arms come to rest around Keith's waist. Their faces are close again now and James loves being able to look Keith in the eyes with barely any distance separating them. ]

What now...? Any other demanding requests, Keith?

[ He might be quite inclined to fulfill them. ]

[Keith doesn't pay attention to where he lets the shirt fall, only vaguely aware of the feeling of clothing slipping from his fingers. James is the only thought on his mind, and Keith looks at him with just his eyes first sweeping his gaze down from the lean musculature of his arms and chest down to a toned torso, all the way back up to swollen lips and then incredible deep blue eyes. Keith's throat goes dry, heart beating fast, too fast, as James' hands move over his chest and settle on his waist, the touch alone sending streaks of warmth coursing through his veins.

It's been four years and the memory of the exact details of the body of the boy he once loved kissing, biting -- touching in any way -- have faded a little, but he knows James now is different in all these subtle ways. The person he used to touch back then was someone who, like him, had only been training, ready only in theory in battles that took place on a computer screen. Those peaceful days of the past are long gone, both of them hardened by loss and warfare in ways that have shaped them not only mentally but physically too.

They're no longer cadets preparing for wars that may never happen. They're both soldiers and survivors. Fleetingly that horror Keith had felt pierce his heart when they crash landed on Earth for the first time in years and saw the toppled ruins of Platt City when he thought James might not have made it comes back and it reminds him that he's so fucking lucky to be here right now, still allowed to cling as hard as he wants, knowing for sure now that they want to be together.

Closing his eyes, Keith places one hand on James' shoulder, the other arm is curved around the small of his back to lock them into a tight embrace, like everything they've gone through, everything they've experienced apart from each other could be shared by pressing up close until all the space between them is gone.]

If you think taking off your shirt is demanding, not sure what you're gonna think of 'stay the night.'

[He doesn't wait for an answer to that though, and instead presses their lips together for another kiss, this one deep almost immediately, somewhere between eager and desperate to claim James' mouth again.]

Edited 2019-02-04 11:05 (UTC)

[ That's... somehow a more vague and sentimental answer than James was expecting. He'd been prodding for specific actions, something to further the physical thing they have going here and forget about the complications of feelings for a moment, but.... stay the night, huh? "The night is pretty much over anyway," James wants to say, but this isn't the time for snark and he can't actually say anything at all, not when Keith is holding his mouth hostage.

Stay the night...

Even during their worst days of desperately pushing themselves against each other in an attempt to make themselves feel wanted, they hadn't stayed with each other for more than one or two hours after they'd worn themselves out. James had only made a few walks of shame much later, when he was semi-publicly dating a female cadet for a brief while. He'd always hated it. The looks and whispers when you've come out of the wrong room in the morning had made him feel sullied, somehow. She'd worn it with pride, he'd simply endured. Part of why they didn't last.

Taking another such walk now, from the Black Paladin's room no less, ought to end up attracting an annoying amount of attention. And yet, James knows that he won't decline this request. This time, he won't make Keith feel like a dirty secret - though with the prestige Keith holds now, it'd be more likely for James to be the inappropriate partner anyway. Strange how the tables turned.

James lets himself fall backwards again, pulling Keith with him through their embrace, until the other boy is on top of him once more. Keith's weight on his chest feels just right, just like he was meant to be there. To intertwine them even further, James wraps one of his legs around Keith's. His hands meanwhile find the border of Keith's bodysuit and he lets his fingertips slip under it just a little, brushing a part of Keith's skin that isn't yet exposed. ]

...mhmmm...

[ It's hard to stay silent when they're basically melting into one another now and James decides that the mere attempt at holding back noises is pretty stupid. He wants Keith. That's not supposed to be a secret any longer. ]

[As James pulls him back down on top of him, Keith moves his hand to brush over his upper arm and chest, fondly tracing over muscle and collarbone. They're both doing a lot of getting reacquainted it seems, and with the question of whether or not James is staying afterwards tacitly settled, Keith relaxes a little further into James' encouraging touch, slowly moving his hips, building up friction between their bodies as they kiss.

The soft noises are what start getting Keith to move a little more insistently, wanting to hear more. He hadn't thought about it in some time, hadn't really had the kind of laxity to entertain idle thoughts about lovers he thought had long forgotten him, but those soft sighs burn in his ears. He didn't think he missed it nearly as much as the shiver running all the way down his spine says he has.

It's all so familiar and yet as nerve wrecking as it had been the very first time he'd realized he wanted James like this. All to himself, only for himself.]

James...

[The name's almost pleading into the kiss, but pleading for what, he's not sure. Keith breaks apart, lips tingling, panting slightly as he looks down at the boy beneath him. God.]

[ James can't help but smile softly at the sight of Keith disheveled and indecent above him. Of course, he himself can't be looking much better. His hair's definitely coming loose and his face continues to feel unnaturally hot. He doesn't mind. Keith looks gorgeous with his lips parted like that and James can confirm that every inappropriate dream he's had after Keith left him really hadn't exaggerated the appeal at all. Only that this is reality and he won't wake up feeling ashamed and angry. ]

You feel unfairly good...

[ Keith really has a magnetic pull on him in every way. He can feel his mission pants straining some, easy proof of his eagerness. ]

... but I bet we could still improve on it.

[ Putting emphasis on his words, James moves one of his hands to the side of Keith's waist, still below the body suit, teasing to go further up front. ]

[His breath hitches as James' hand begins to move. It's been... a really, really long time since Keith let anyone come so close or touch him like this, and by all accounts this should already be overwhelming, and he ought to, like James, be feeling some degree of tense arousal. In many ways, it is exactly that -- heart racing and too warm despite being half naked. But it's also overwhelming in ways that just aren't as exciting.

James is bolder, more confident and knowing why that is inspires the worst kind of mixed feelings. On the one hand, he's intrigued. James openly wanting him is a better feeling than he ever allowed himself to think, but on the other hand the change is so distinct in his mind that the longer he dwells on it the stranger he feels. No doubt other people have brought this side out of James, and for so many stupid, irrational reasons he can't help wishing he knew then what he knows now and that other people had never been a part of the equation.

It's a thought that goes nowhere in the end and at present all he really knows is that James finds happiness in how awkward he feels about it. Stupid.]

Guess you're gonna have to work harder then.

Edited 2019-02-05 17:19 (UTC)

[ James huffs at that. For how passionately Keith had been kissing until just now, the response is lukewarm and definitely places the ball in James' court. ]

Well, I'm nothing if not a hard worker... and there's years to make up for.

[ There's no discouragement towards the journey of his hand, so he makes it to the front in one slow and smooth movement. For a moment, he keeps his fingers resting. His own heartbeat is echoing loudly in his ears, no matter how much confidence his words may suggest. James finds himself licking his lips nervously, subconsciously. Keith... It's been so long since he touched him (and really, touched anyone, thanks to the war) and there is a strange sense of performance anxiety. What for? He has to wonder. It's not like simply touching a dick is difficult.

Stalling for time to just a second longer, James leans up for press another kiss to Keith's collar area and then, finally, he moves his hand lower. The fabric of the bodysuit is fairly restrictive and he's starting to figure that soon they should get rid of clothing alltogether. ]

You expecting to get graded for this, too?

[The snark comes easily. James is a hard worker alright, but it's still a little strange to hear that applied to lewdness as well now, even in jest. Different. Less uptight. But speaking of tight, the under armor is certainly that and Keith can't quite shake the weirdness that is getting his cock stroked while wearing his paladin gear. The idle thought is quickly discarded however, when he remembers something else though. ]

...Wait-- [Keith tenses noticeably as that hand moves further down between his legs, a deep flush starting to spread across his cheeks as soon as fingers that aren't his brush along the base.] ..ah...

[The little noise catches on a sharper intake of breath. Well so much for wait then, huh. Vaguely embarrassed, he busies himself with nipping at the shell of James' ear. He's just going to hope the guy isn't going to point out the underwear situation. Or lack thereof.]

[ James rolls his eyes at the comment about grades but is not further deterred in his movements. There's a mission here now and the mission is to make Keith lose composure enough to not make such quips anymore. Focused on that as well as his own growing desire, James doesn't actually have the brainspace to spare for any thoughts about Keith's state of underwear at least.

There isn't actually enough space to properly close his hand around Keith, so instead James settles for moving up and down the crotch area, massaging.

His own breath is coming out audibly and he sighs softly at the attention Keith is paying to his ear. Even for himself, James can't quite decide whether he wants to draw this out or impatiently get rid of any remaining clothing obstacles. ]

[Any relief Keith feels about a lack of commentary is fairly short lived as James' touch gets distractingly insistent. There area lot of things about this that are achingly familiar, though the physical strain of skin tight clothing isn't one of those things and as much as he doesn't necessarily want James to stop, it's getting even tighter than it already was and the physical discomfort is getting harder to ignore.

Reaching down, he grabs James' wrist, speaking low and soft into his ear.]

Hold on. Let me take this off.

Edited 2019-02-06 15:42 (UTC)

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